Cancer and your emotions
Cancer and your emotions
Overview
- How does cancer affect your emotions?
- Physical symptoms and emotions
- Do feelings affect cancer?
- Talking and getting support
- Who you can talk to
- Your feelings and relationships
- Looking after yourself
- If you identify as LGBTQ+
- Advanced cancer
How does cancer affect your emotions?
It’s common to have many different emotions when you’re told you have cancer. These can be difficult to cope with. Partners, family and friends may also have some of the same feelings.
There are lots of different reactions to cancer. You might not have any of the emotions talked about here. There’s no right or wrong way to feel. You’ll cope with things in your own way.
Some of the common feelings are included here.
Shock and denial
You may find it hard to believe that you have cancer when you’re first diagnosed. It’s common to feel shocked and numb. You may not be able to understand all the information you’re given. You may find that you keep asking the same questions.At first, it can be hard to talk about the cancer. Or you might find it hard to think or talk about anything else. Both reactions are normal. Your mind is trying to process what’s happening. These feelings usually get easier over time.
Fear and anxiety
You may be anxious or frightened about whether treatments will work and what will happen in the future. This can be one of the hardest things to cope with.
It can help to try to focus on things you can control. You may want to find out more about:
- the cancer you have
- your treatment options
- how to manage any side effects
It can also help to talk about your feelings.
Try to keep doing the things that are important to you and that you enjoy.
Sadness and depression
You may feel sad if you have to change your plans because of the cancer, or if your future feels uncertain.
Feeling sad is a natural reaction to change or loss. This feeling may come and go during and after your treatment.
For most people, these periods of sadness get better. But for some people, the sadness may continue or get worse.
If you think the sadness may be turning into depression, there are things you can do to help.
Common Symptoms
Symptom information is not available for this condition yet.
⚠️ This symptom list is for educational purposes. Having these symptoms does not mean you have this condition. See a doctor for proper diagnosis.
Medicines Commonly Used
⚠️ These medicines are commonly used for confirmed diagnoses of this condition. This is NOT a recommendation or prescription. Treatment must be determined by your doctor.
No medicines have been linked to this condition yet.
Prevention
Avoidance
You may cope by trying not to find out much about the cancer. Or you may cope by not talking about it. If you feel like this, tell people that you don’t want to talk about it right now. You can also tell your cancer doctor if there are things you don’t want to know or talk about yet.Sometimes, it may be hard to accept that you have cancer. This can stop you making decisions about treatment. If this happens, it’s very important to get help from your healthcare team.You may feel that your family or friends are avoiding you or avoiding talking about the cancer. This is usually because they’re also finding it difficult to cope. They may need support too. Try to tell them how this makes you feel. It may help you, your family and friends talk openly about how you’re feeling.
Anger
You may feel angry about your diagnosis. You may also resent other people for being well. These are normal reactions. They’re more likely when you feel frightened, stressed or unwell.
You may get angry with your family, friends or partner. Tell them you’re angry at your illness and not at them.
Finding ways to relax can help with anger. This can include:
- talking about how you feel
- writing down how you feel
- doing gentle exercise
- having relaxation therapy
- meditating
Guilt and blame
You may feel guilty or blame yourself for the cancer. You may want to find reasons for why it has happened to you.
Most of the time, it’s impossible to know exactly what causes a cancer. Over time, a combination of different risk factors may cause a cancer. Doctors don’t fully understand all these factors yet. Try to focus on taking care of yourself and getting the help and support you need.
You may feel guilty that the cancer will affect other people in your life. You may worry that they’ll find it difficult to cope. Try to tell them how this makes you feel. It may help you, your family and friends to talk openly about how you’re feeling.
Feeling alone
You may feel alone or isolated. This could be because you don’t think you have support. Family and friends may live far away, be busy or feel uncomfortable talking about the cancer.
Try to tell your family and friends how you feel. This can help them find ways to support you.
You may have times when you want to be alone for a while. But if you find you’re avoiding people a lot of the time, try to talk to your doctor or nurse.
Further information and support
Macmillan Cancer Support has further information to support you. You can:
- phone the Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00
- chat to Macmillan specialists online
- talk to others affected by cancer on Macmillan’s Online Community